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Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Holidays & Infertility: How To Get Through The Emotional Ups and Downs

 “When you’re infertile and struggling to get pregnant,  even the sight of  a sidewalk Santa Claus can bring tears to your eyes. “  -  Sarah S, fertility patient.

 by Colette Bouchez

The stockings are hung by the chimney with care - and everywhere you look it seems the world is decorated just for children.  Indeed, it's the holiday season - and there's almost no other time of the year when the concept of family is more prominent.     
And for most folks, a warm and loving family celebration - complete with the "kids" table - is the picture perfect postcard of what the holidays should be.
But if you're trying to conceive - and especially if you're having a difficult time getting pregnant  – this time of year, and the emphasis on family and children,  might not make you feel much like celebrating.
"Normally the holidays bring out all kinds of emotions in everyone - happy memories, sad remembrances - and all kinds of feelings rise to the surface," says fertility expert Dr. Niels Lauersen, author of the brand new book "Eat, Love, Get Pregnant: A Couple's Guide To Boosting Fertility and Having A Healthy Baby " ( Ivy League Press - December 2011).

But when you are trying to conceive, " says Dr.Lauersen, "emotions are in especially high gear, and with so much emphasis on family and children, it's easy to see how couples trying to conceive can really feel  the sting of being childless this time of year more than ever, " he says. 
Other experts in the field agree.
"The nature of infertility is isolating. Holidays that are centered on family and the celebration of children tend to amplify the feelings of beingon the outside,  " says Eugenia L. Gullick, Ph.D, a psychologist with Reproductive Endocrinology Associates of Charlotte, North Carolina, an Attain Fertility Center.
"We have over 13,000 Fans in our Facebook community and ... one of the most common [holiday] threads of conversation was about the desire to isolate and avoid family gatherings altogether," says Stephanie Himmel-Nelson, Community Manager for Attain Fertility. 
Jealousy, Anger, and Infertility
But in addition to feelings of isolation,  Dr. Lauersen says many couples may also feel an almost uncontrollable sense of jealousy and even anger towards friends and family members who either have children or who are pregnant - emotions they then feel guilty about experiencing.
If that is how you feel, Dr. Lauersen says it’s okay -  and ....

To continue reading this article click here.




Copyright by Colette Bouchez 2011 - All Rights Reserved. In addition to US Copyright, the text of this FERTILITY BLOG is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 License. All Formatting and style elements of this page are not available under this license and Colette Bouchez retains all rights in those elements.